Uncertainty

Next week will bring me some much needed answers to a couple of questions that have been making me very nervous lately.  Ever since I found out the baby is breech and I may need a c-section, I've been understandably anxious.  And John may have some changes coming up at work that, among other things, could mean he won't be able to take his planned five weeks off when the baby is born.

Both events, the birth of our child, whether natural or surgical, and the possible changes in John's job are good things.  Great things!  But I don't do well with uncertainty, particularly when I'm obscenely pregnant and hormonal. 

Next week we will know if the baby's turned head down (incidentally, I think he may be laying sideways right now, hopefully in route to his final head first exit position).  If he has, great!  Plan A:  "Wait for Labor"  will immediately go into effect.  If he's still insisting on being butt down, I'm not messing around.  He had his chance to get with the program and I will schedule his eviction via c-section hopefully in the next three weeks.

We should also find out the details of the possible job changes for John next week.  Normally this wouldn't be a source of anxiety for me, but because these changes would occur at virtually the same time that we are expecting our child, it complicates matters a bit.  If John can't take the planned time off for the birth, I'm very nervous about being home alone with a toddler and a newborn baby.  I'm particularly freaking out about the prospect of being home alone with a toddler and a newborn baby after having my midsection hacked open for a c-section.

Now the c-section and John being unable to take time off are real possibilities, and if this is what we find out next week, I can deal with it.  It's just the not knowing that is causing all the trouble.  If I know this is the scenario we're going to encounter, then I can begin making plans to make it go as smoothly as possible.  Luckily, we should have both answers by next Friday.  But it will be a long week of wringing my hands and wondering how things will sort out.