Blink

Alex is growing up way too fast. I mean it. A week ago he was basically a toddler, and today, he ran past me saying "I got to go potty!", when I followed him to the bathroom, he closed the door on my face and said "It's PWIBAT!"  When he was done, he changed his clothes, put the dirty ones in his laundry bucket and picked out a new outfit and got dressed for the day, then he went in the kitchen, opened the fridge and got himself a Gogurt.

What the hell?

Everyone says this, that they grow up so fast, and you'd better enjoy it while you can, and I was all "yeah yeah, sure." and then I blinked and my BABY was a KID and when did this happen?

It's not a bad thing, no, not at all. I am insanely proud of Alex. He is crazy awesome and he gets better the older he gets.  I don't wish he were little again, I'm just shocked that he's not little any more. 

I'm going to keep a close eye on Max. I could very well wake up tomorrow and they'll both be off to college!

Baby's first word? Oh God, I hope not.

As you already know, Max is a breastfeeder.  Boy loves him some boobies.  When I'm trying to feed him something that is not dispensed from my nipples, and a boobie meal is really what he would prefer, he will paw at my boobs and yank on my shirt collar. 

Yesterday, I was attempting to feed him some pureed bananas, and he was grabbing at my chest as usual.  Then he looked me in the eyes, placed his little chubby hand on my left boob and said "Tata"

So there it is.  Max's first word.  Not Mama, not Dada.  No, it's tata. Nice.

We have the plague, but at least I'm loosing weight!

Alex is back to having a plain old ordinary cold after having a nasty case of Croup last week.  I'd be thrilled that he's almost back to playdate condition, except that now Max has RSV AND an ear infection, so we're all stuck inside for at least another week, maybe two.

Thankfully Max's bronchiolitis isn't bad enough to land him in the hospital, yet anyway.  He's just, you know, miserable.  Wheezing and coughing and leaking goop from all of his head holes.  His ear infection was only a minor one, but it was bad enough to have him crying non-stop for 48 hours, stop sleeping, eating and nursing.  The antibiotic and numbing drops for his ear seem to already be helping him, as he slept pretty well last night, as for the RSV, we've just got to wait it out and give him Motrin for the fever.

John and I have been sick with colds for the last two weeks, and yesterday we both thought we were finally on the mend, but we both woke up back at square one, coughing, sniffling, sore throats and headaches.  I suppose it was inevitable seeing as how we've been sharing our bed with two mucous covered petrie dishes of doom for the last week.

John's going to the doctor today, though I'm not sure it will do much good.  I think he's just got a cold, but with his history of athsma, I suppose it's better for him to get his lungs listened to, just to make sure it's not something worse. 

In other news, I posted my one month progress pictures at Bodies.  I can kind of see the difference, enough to keep me motivated and excited to see what kind of changes another month might bring.

http://www.bodiesinmotivation.com/2009/02/one-month-update-with-pictures/

Meme about us

Since we're about to celebrate our anniversary, I thought it would be fun to do a couple's meme.  Plus, if Dooce AND Sundry can do this meme, it can't be too lame right?

What are your middle names?
Mine is Lee, and his is LeRoy. Yep, with the capitol "R" and everything. Incedentally, we have the same initials:  JLD

How long have you been together?
We've been together seven and a half years, married for six in March.

How long did you know each other before you started dating?
We didn't.  We started out dating.  We met online, so I suppose we wrote back and forth for a few days, but we decided pretty quickly that we wanted to meet each other, and once we did, that was it, we were dating.

Who asked whom out?
It was a mutual decision to meet up at a coffee shop.  I guess he asked to meet me first if you want to get technical.

How old are each of you?
 We're both 31.

Whose siblings do you see the most?
His.  We never see either of my sisters who live in California.  He's REALLY close to his siblings.  It's just lucky that I love them too I guess.

Which situation is the hardest on you as a couple?
Parenting.  Different ideas on what to discipline and how.  We don't really share the work of parenting equally either since I'm a stay at home mom, John tends to view everything that isn't fun as optional for him, for example, he's never once given either kid a bath.  He's gotten much better about helping me out on the weekends though.

Did you go to the same school?
 No, I went to a technical school and he went to the University of Utah.

Are you from the same home town?
No, but close.  I grew up pretty much where we live now.  He lived in Cedar City and Murray during his formative years.

Who is smarter?
When I asked him this he says "You".  When I asked him if he was saying that only because he wanted to have sex again someday, he said yes.  The truth is, we're both fairly intelligent.  John is "show-offy" smart. He loves Trivia games and sprinkling big words throughout his vocabulary.  But there is no way he'd have married me if I wasn't at least as smart as he was.  John has an incredible memory.  He can read or hear something once and he stores it in his brain forever, ready to pull the knowledge out when needed.  Me, I can barely remember my phone number.  I am much more analytical and logical than he is.  I can find a solution to any problem and I'm also an excellent multi-tasker, and these are not strengths of his.  He's great at Math, I can't calculate a tip.  I can pinpoint the serial killer in movies and TV shows LONG before he even suspects them.  So, I guess we're equally smart, but in different ways.

Who is the most sensitive?
Oh, me for sure.

Where do you eat out most as a couple?
John's favorite place to eat is Wingers, a little diner with a great Buffalo Wing sauce.  I'm not too picky, and it makes him so happy to go there, so that's where we usually end up.

Where is the furthest you two have traveled together as a couple?
Two years ago we spent a month in Panama.  Separately I've been to Denmark and he spent two years in Costa Rica.

Who has the craziest exes?
Me.  But not stalker crazy, just wierd guys.  I suppose the fact that I have more exes than he has stacked the deck in my favor for this question.

Who has the worst temper?
I think we both have equally bad tempers.  Mine's a bit quicker to go off than his but then I also calm down faster than he does.

Who does the cooking?
Well, you'd have to use the word "cooking" very loosely here, but that would be me.  John's idea of cooking is fixing a bowl of cold cereal or microwaving leftovers.

Who is the neat-freak?
I think it would surprise his family to know this, but I am.  Pre-married John was a total neat freak, but when he moved in with me and my four pets (2 cats and 2 dogs at the time) he stopped caring all that much.  Now, he's kind of a slob at least in "my" areas of our house.  He never picks up after himself, he drops his dirty clothes on the floor inches away from the hamper, he leaves dirty dishes all over the kitchen, and I find little piles of his fingernail clippings on the side tables WAY too often.  He has never, since we've been married, done any housework in any area of our home except his mancave (basement).  His mancave, however, is spotless and gets dusted and vacuumed regularly.

Who is more stubborn?
John. Absolutely, without question, John.  He gives new and enhanced meaning to the word stubborn sometimes.

Who hogs the bed?
 John

Who wakes up earlier?
I do

Where was your first date?
A little coffee shop that no longer exists.  We then went back to his place to watch a movie, which also no longer exists.

Who is more jealous?
Neither of us are jealous types.  I suppose I sometimes get jealous when he gets to go out of town for the weekend and I'm stuck alone with the kids. 

How long did it take to get serious?
About six months (if you do the math, that is one month AFTER we moved in together)

Who eats more?
John does.  Unless I'm pregnant, and then me.  Definately me.

Who does the laundry?
John doesn't do laundry. Ever.

Who's better with the computer?
John is, and that's strange because I'm the one who worked in IT for 10 years.

Who drives when you are together?
John does, but only because I hate to drive.

Max sounds

Max makes sounds I've never heard come out of a baby.  You know, most babies do this cute babbly thing with some cooing and laughing.  Max does that sometimes, but mostly he hisses, growls and makes weird clicking and clucking sounds like a Bushman.

The other day he was in his walker and banging into all of my kitchen appliances and hissing at them.  BANG (hit's fridge) "HISSSSSSSS" turns around BANG (hits stove) "HIIIISSSSSSSSSSSSS!"  This went on for about a half hour. 

Sometimes when I'm tickling him he'll be laughing and then he'll smile, (or maybe it's a sneer, baring his clenched teeth) and growl. "GRRRRRRR". 

He also bites. 

Seriously, did I give birth to a puppy? A mutant snake? 

As for his speaking in African tongues, I don't know where that came from.  I mean, it's cute, in a kind of weird sort of way.  I guess it's just Max's way of being unique.  As a second child, he's constantly compared to his big brother, and maybe these vocalizations are his way of standing out.  See? Look at me! I am multi-lingual!  I speak Dog, Bushman and Parseltounge!

Sick

Yea, this is getting old.  Everyone in our house is STILL sick.  Alex and I fought about him taking his medicine last night (Decadron for Croup). I crushed it up and put it in some apple juice, wouldn't take it. I mixed it in with applesauce. Refused to take it.  Finally I conned him into taking it by putting the applesauce back in the cup and smoothing the foil over the top again and putting it back in the cupboard.  Then I waited a while, got the cup out of the pantry and made a big to do about opening up a nice fresh cup of unmedicated applesauce, which he then ate, and promptly threw up. MY GOD!

So I freaked out a bit because I had no more medication and called the after hours clinic, but we couldn't get in until 10 and they said they had a 45 minute wait. Meaning a doctor wouldn't see him until nearly 11 and they wouldn't just give me more medication because it was a different doctor than he saw the night before.  I decided Alex would be better off staying at home even without the second dose of medication.  I figured if he got worse by morning, I'd just take him to see his regular doctor this morning.

Alex did fine through the night, he's still coughing something terrible, but it's less barky and more wet which leads me to believe it's a bit more productive.  No more fever and he's got some of his energy back.  Energy enough to make a mess out of the house, annoy the dog and earn himself a couple of timeouts already this morning.  So, I'm pretty sure he's on the mend.

Max woke up at 4:45 with a fever and even nastier cough than yesterday.  Adding a little ear pulling has earned him a trip to the doctor later this morning where I'm fairly certain I'll be told that he too has Croup, or ear infection, or some exotic baby disease.  It's Max's first "sick baby" trip to the doctor since we brought him home from the hospital.  Normally I'm a wait and see kind of mom, but with Alex having Croup and Max's habit of putting everything Alex touches in his mouth, I'm positive there was some mucous cross contamination.

John's still got his Man Cold and I've got the same cold, but it's a Mom Cold, meaning, no one really gives a shit.  Luckily it's not that bad, more annoying than anything else.  I can't wait for the boys to start feeling better because we've been stuck in the house for nearly two weeks and if I don't get out of here soon, I'm going to go crazy!

Bowl for Kids' Sake

John is bowling to to help support Big Brothers and Big Sisters of Utah again this year.

Click here to donate. Any amount helps, even just a little, and hey! It's tax deductible!

Twofer

Two new posts up at Bodies:

http://www.bodiesinmotivation.com/2009/02/less-fat-pants/

http://www.bodiesinmotivation.com/2009/02/aggressive-goals/

Happy bleeping Valentine's Day

Our Valentine's day kinda sucked.  John's sick, so he didn't want to go anywhere.  He slept until noon (he got up with the baby that night), so breakfast was out, I ran and got McDonalds for lunch. Alex had stolen the box of conversation hearts I was going to give to John and ate most of them, the rest he threw in the dog water.  I ran to the store to get more, but they'd already put away or sold most of the Valentine candy.  All I could find were SweetTart Hearts.  John was understandably disappointed.  He LOVES conversation hearts.  John had surprised me with a card, a dozen roses and a box of See's chocolates. I felt like a total ass, having gotten him just a card and a 50 cent box of candy I'd let Alex eat.  I figured I'd make it up to him later that evening.

We hung out downstairs in front of the TV all afternoon eating my chocolates until I fell asleep at 4:00.  I slept until 8, and woke up to find both the boys asleep.  We put them to bed and were giddy with the idea that here it was 8:00, the kids were in bed and I still had my eyes open.  So naturally, we watched the BSG we'd missed on Friday.  It took a while because we had to go back and rewind it to watch everything about the missing number 7 again.  And again.  Then we had to talk about the missing number 7, because dude, it's not Starbuck?  Really?  (For the record, I still think it's Starbuck)

Just as we were headed upstairs for some Valentine's Day lovin', Alex got out of bed soaked in pee.  I stripped his bed, but the real damage was that he'd peed on Blue Blankie.  So downstairs we all went while I ran his favorite blanket through the laundry.

We were all getting tired, so as soon as the wash cycle was over, John threw Blue Blankie in the dryer and we convinced Alex that we should all have a family cuddle in bed upstairs.  This was a bad idea.  Though he'd been given Diego Blankie as a temporary replacement, he was over tired and missing his lovey.  This combination always means screaming and crying.  The screaming and crying woke up the baby and John and I each took a boy to try to calm.  I had Alex and John had Max.  Alex's tantrum just continued escalating so I put him in his room where the tantrum went nuclear.

We decided it would be best to switch kids, John would take Alex back downstairs and watch Mighty Machines until Blue Blankie was dry and I would cave in and nurse Max back to sleep.  Needless to say, by the time both boys were asleep in their own beds again, we were way, WAY to tired for further Valentine's Day festivities. 

Oh well.  It's a good thing that we tend to be lovey dovey all the year round. Valentine's Day can be a good excuse to buy (and eat) candy and it's always the only time of year John buys me flowers, but when it goes bad like it did yesterday, it's not the end of the world. We'll try again next year.

Crush

I've got a crush on someone. Just typing that makes me feel 13 all over again. But, it's true. I'm 31 years old and I have a crush.

It's John.  Yep. I have a crush on my husband.  Isn't that cool?

I didn't know that could happen.  I mean I LOVE John. I've loved John for seven years and we've got an awesome marriage.  We're happier than I thought married people could be.  We'd settled into this really comfortable routine.  Things were good, they stayed good.  We were happy and comfortable and in love.  But, something's happened in the last couple of months. I feel all a twitter about him again. Reminiscent of the days when we were dating, I'd spend the night at his place and we'd stay up all night cuddling and talking and, well, not talking, if you know what I mean *wink wink*.  We were falling in love and it was new and exciting and fun. 

And here we are, seven and a half years later and I'm feeling that way again.  We're cuddling and talking and not talking, and let me tell you, I didn't know that the not talking could be this good after two kids.  But I could not talk to him EVERY NIGHT ALL NIGHT LONG.  It's the best not talking I've ever had in my life.

I wonder if I'm falling in love with the man he's become.  He's different now than he was in the beginning.  He's more responsible, he's a father, he's experienced moments of great happiness and heartbreaking tragedy.  It's changed him, he's a different guy.  Could it be that's why I'm feeling like this again? 

I suppose it doesn't matter. If you get to fall in love with the man of your dreams again, don't second guess it, just enjoy it.

Sometimes you just need to tell them what to say

"Honey, I've lost 25 pounds since I had Max"

"uh huh"

"That's 25 pounds AFTER all the baby stuff."

"uh huh"

"Honey, that 25 pounds doesn't include the 15 pounds of baby, placenta, blood, water..all that stuff.  That's 25 pounds of me, just gone!"

"uh huh"

"I'm wearing PRE-PREGNANCY jeans right now"

"yep"

"Jeans Honey. Jeans don't lie.  There's no elastic waistband."

"uh huh"

"Ok, what I'm looking for here is something along the lines of 'damn Honey, you're looking hot'"

"Damn Honey, you look hot!"

"Aw, thanks Honey!"

Celebrating small successes

After a week of Max rejecting every single nipple and sippy cup that wasn't made of my own personal boob-flesh, I can finally report PROGRESS!

This evening, Max partook of a few sips from an Avent bottle with silicone nipple that was filled with Fruit Punch Pedialyte.

He then decided bottles are for suckers and pushed it away.

BUT STILL! A bottle with a synthetic nipple was allowed passage into his mouth and he actually actively took a few sucks.  I think he was willing to try it because it was a different taste.  I'd been trying different formulas and expressed breastmilk only to be met with furious cries of anger and resentment.  The new taste of the Pedialyte intrigued him, it was different, and clearly wasn't a substitute for the boobs.

So I continue to soldier on with the hope that he will one day drink liquids that don't have to come directly out of my nipples.

As for our sleeping arrangements, that's not going so well.  Up three times last night, but I did refuse to nurse him at 3AM (I did at midnight and 5AM though). I rocked him for 20 min, he was still screaming so I put him in his crib and let him scream for another 20 mintues (the most agonizing 20 minutes of my life I tell you), then I went back and rocked him again and he fell asleep. I'm hoping if I can stop nursing him when he wakes up, he'll just stop waking up and sleep through 'til morning.  Maybe not, but it's worth a try anyway.

 

Identifying the problem

New post at Bodies in Motivation is up:

http://www.bodiesinmotivation.com/2009/02/identifying-the-problem/

Rejection

Getting Max to take a bottle is going about as well as can be expected. Observe:

Sleeping kid, sick kid

Max went to bed last night, in his room, in his own crib, and slept until 3AM.

3AM I SAY! 

HALLELUJAH!

I nursed him and he went back down at 4AM, in his room, in his own crib, and slept until 6:30.

HALLELUJAH! HALLELUJAH!

This is progress.  Not only did he sleep in his own bed, which has never happened, but he only got up once!

Sadly, I still wasn't able to get any sleep last night because poor Alex woke up at midnight on fire with a fever of 100 according to the thermometer stuck in his armpit.  I put him in bed with us and then he threw up all over himself.  I made a middle of the night run to the store for some Children's Tylenol, he took it like a champ, asked for some juice to wash it down and slept fitfully in my arms the rest of the night.

In addition to not being able to sleep next to a thrashing bony heater, I was worried that surely Max must be laying there dead in his crib and that's why he's not screaming bloody murder to be rescued, so I made no less than 10 trips in there to put my hand on his chest to make sure he was breathing.  One of those trips was at 3AM and I wonder, had I left him alone, would he have slept right through?

This morning Alex is still warm, but says he feels better, and he hasn't horked since the one time last night.  Max is positively gleeful, all that sleep must have done him some good because he's been full of joy and happness since he woke up.

I'm still running on empty, I probably only got an hour or so of sleep last night (and the night before Max only let me have two hours of sleep all night), but the amazing thing about being a mom is somehow, when your kid needs you, like Alex does today because he's sick, I know I'll be able to be SuperMom despite the exahustion.  I'll crash the second he goes to bed tonight for sure, but my experience tells me that I'll be able to pull from my reserves to get through the day and be the Mommy he needs.

Mama's boy

I am making plans to go with some of my aunts, cousins and grandma to Mexico in April. A real girls trip!  I haven't been on a trip without the kids since I had them and I haven't been on a girls trip, well, ever.  It's the perfect opportunity for me, my aunt has a place right on the beach in Cabo (which she is trying to sell, anyone in the market for a Mexican villa?) and along with all the sleeping through the night I plan on doing, I'm really looking forward to spending some real time with my extended family.  Living in Utah while they live in California, it's hard to really develop bonds with my family.  It's never too late to try to develop closer relationships I say.  And what better way than sipping margaritas on the beach together?

John, though scared out of his mind at the idea of being home alone with both kids for a week, has said he'll help me make the trip happen.  We're pooling our SkyMiles for the flight so the trip is actually going to be quite affordable. John has no desire to go to Mexico, so I don't even have to feel guilty about going on a beach vacation without him. 

The big kink in my plans goes by the name of Max, who, as you know, is a bit of a boobaholic, he's also a big time mama's boy.  The longest I've left his side is three hours, and here I'm making plans to leave him for a week.

I need to make four things happen in order for me to go:

1. Get Max to take a bottle
   
2. Stockpile a week's worth of expressed boob juice
   
3. Get Max to fall asleep without my boob in his mouth
   
4. 
   

   Get Max to sleep in his own crib (hopefully through the night), he currently co-sleeps with me

I've got 10 weeks or so to make these things happen and I believe it can be done, really, these things should have been taken care of months ago, now I just have the motivation to do it.  I'm hoping this will also make weaning him easier since I plan to do that in June (I'll pump'n'dump on the trip to keep my milk up so I can continue nursing him when I get home).  The way he is now about nursing, I was having visions of him breastfeeding until he goes off to college.  It'll also be nice to have the marital bed back instead of the family bed we currently have. 

Anyone have any advice for me? Alex was so easy, took a bottle fine, slept in his own bed through the night since 8 weeks old...I have no experience with a clingy baby.

Anger management

Recently, Alex has been a tantrumy, whiny, bad tempered child with some major anger management issues.  Several times a day I am having to put him in his room to calm down. 

**Of course, he is only this way with me and John because the very second anyone else is near him the horns recede into his head, the flames erupting from his mouth fizzle out and he's all cuteness and light again. WTF????**

Putting him in his room is the only thing I can think of to do.  When he's stomping around, roaring and spitting, and crying and upending tables, chairs and throwing toys in every direction a) it's dangerous to be around him and b) Anything I say or do just pisses him off even more.  So, I pick him up, screeching like a wounded pterodactyl, plop him in his bed with Blue Blankie and tell him he can come out when he's calmed down.  Sometimes he comes out 30 seconds later, sometimes he stays in there screaming toddler profanities so long he falls asleep.

This technique works pretty well because I think it offers him the opportunity to learn how calm himself without really feeling like he's being punished.  He can come out of his room as soon as he's chilled the eff out.  I don't close the door, and anything goes in there.  Screaming, kicking the wall, throwing his toys...whatever.  If he comes out of his room still in a rage, back he goes.  More often than not, he comes out after about five minutes and tells me "Mommy, I'm calm now".

As for the source of these temper tantrums, I'm still at a loss.  Is it the age?  Half years always seem to be hardest for us.  18 months was awful, 2.5 was misery and 3.5 might very well do us in.  I'm hoping, just like everything else, this too shall pass.

One bad day

New post up at Bodies in Motivation

http://www.bodiesinmotivation.com/2009/02/one-bad-day/

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