2008 resolutions

1. Only gain half as much weight (or less) during this pregnancy as I did with Alex (Which should be fairly easy, I gained almost 60 pounds with Alex, which gives me 30 pounds to work with for the next six months, so far - 16 weeks, I've only gained 3)



2. Loose the pregnancy weight by the end of the year.



3. Finally finish Alex's first year photo book



4. Be more active as a family.  We spend way too much time downstairs in front of the TV watching Star Trek re-runs.  I want us to get OUT and do SOMETHING together as a family at least once a week.  Even if it's just a picnic at the park on a Sunday afternoon.



5. Stick to our "total money makeover".  Be gazelle intense.  DO NOT ACCUMULATE MORE DEBT! 

2007 in review

I thought this might be a fun end of year exercise thanks to Linda at All & Sundry:

1. What did you do in 2007 that you’d never done before?
 Live in another country (Panama) for a month
2. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?

Well, let's see, here's last year's resolutions:

Loose 40 pounds (the obligatory weight loss goal) Not even close

Find things I love to do (i.e. get some hobbies) and do them often.  Ideas: writing, taking pictures, crafts... Took some photography classes this year

Take Alex out to socialize with other kids once a week at a minimum. And then some! We have playgroups / playdates three days a week.

Get myself out to socialize with other adults once a week at a minimum Unless playgroups count, no.  But I am managing a once a month mom's night out.

Less TV.  Ideally, Alex and I would limit our daytime TV to 1 hour and as a family, our evening TV time to 2 hours.  Not sure how I'm going to get John on board with this goal.  We're down to two hours or less daytime TV. 

Read one non-kid / non-parenting book per month about two a month!

Create and stick to a household budget.  Yikes! Not quite.  This will be on my 2008 list for sure.

Get our front yard into shape (Spring/Summer) Almost.  I did do a lot of work out there this year

Spend more time with family (both John's and mine).  Have everyone over for BBQ's, do crafts with mom, call Grandma weekly, have Alex draw pictures for Vince and Raquel, get Alex and Baby Lily together often (well, after she's born of course)... Not as much as we'd like.  Will work on this for 2008

I will definitely be making 2008 resolutions

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
Yes, and now we have our beautiful niece Lily
4. Did anyone close to you die?
Thankfully no
5. What countries did you visit?
We all went to Panama.  John went to Canada twice on his own
6. What would you like to have in 2008 that you lacked in 2007?
Better control of our finances
7. What dates from 2007 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
Father's day / John's birthday.  Going to Fenway park and watching John and Alex get to play catch on the field.  That was really, REALLY cool
8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
I didn't do anything spectacular this year.  I think ending the year healthy, pregnant and still madly in love with my son and husband is a pretty great achievement though.
9. What was your biggest failure?
We did not stay on a budget this year, in fact, we managed to accumulate additional bills.
10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
Only real "illness" I've suffered this year was debilitating morning sickness
11. What was the best thing you bought?
My camera, Digital Canon Rebel Xti.  Definitely money very well spent!
12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
John has made HUGE steps in being more engaged with Alex when he plays with him.  He's also helping out a lot more in the not-so-fun parts of parenting like diaper changes and discipline.
13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
I am embarrassed to admit that I've been following the Britney / Train wreck /custody battle 
14. Where did most of your money go?
Travel
15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
The Panama trip in February was huge for me.  I was so excited about it I didn't sleep for a week before we left.  There's also the whole, having a new baby thing too!
16. What song will always remind you of 2007?
My favorite song this year has been Sweet by Jehro.
17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
 a) happier or sadder? 
b) thinner or fatter? 
c) richer or poorer? This is surprising.  Apparently wealth and beauty have nothing to do with my happiness.

18. What do you wish you’d done more of?
Dates with John
19. What do you wish you’d done less of?
Throwing up (morning sickness)
20. How did you spend Christmas? Family get-togethers and lots and lots of honey baked ham.

21. Did you fall in love in 2007?
Boston. I fell in love with Boston
22. What was your favorite TV program?
The Naked Archeaologist which I can't watch anymore because we canceled our cable :(
23. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?
Not really
24. What was the best book you read?
The life of Pi
25. What was your greatest musical discovery? Jehro

26. What did you want and get?
A dSLR camera
27. What did you want and not get?  I got pretty much everything I wanted this year, and then some.  

28. What was your favorite film of this year?
I didn't see a lot of movies this year, and I couldn't call any of the movies I did see a favorite.
29. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
Not a whole lot on my actual birthday, however John and I both turned 30 this year, so we pretty much celebrated our 30th year all year round by taking some opportunities to travel and make big purchases we ordinarily wouldn't make.
30. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying? Maid service for our house
31. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2007?
If it's clean it's fit to be seen on me in public.
32. What kept you sane?
My mom's group, Mom's Time Out
33. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most? Does Simcha Jacobovichi count as a celebrity or public figure?  I LOVE his show the Naked Archaeologist and I watched The Lost Tomb of Jesus twice.  I'm such a sucker for archeology shows and the way he goes about telling a story, like reenacting the battle of Jericho with Lego's.  I mean, what's not to love?  

34. What political issue stirred you the most? I'm really interested in the Democratic Primary.  This is the first time I've been really interested in some of the candidates and excited about the possibilities for change in the future

35. Who did you miss?
My dad.  I suppose I'll always miss him.  I also miss my dog Midnight.
36. Who was the best new person you met?
All the ladies from my mom's group
37. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2007.
Surrender to Motherhood.  Instead of thinking about the things I can't do or have anymore and dwelling on all of the "sacrifices" I'm making, remember how lucky I am to get to be a mother and how desperately I wanted to be one.  Appreciate the things I get to do now that I wouldn't were I not a mother.  Love every single second with Alex, even the not so great things.
38. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.
You never do know what's around the bend
A big adventure or a brand new friend
When you're curious, like Curious George
(Swing!)

Christmas 2007 Redux

Our holiday was fantastic!  Alex got thoroughly spoiled and John and I got to play Santa for Alex for the first time, complete with cookies, a big pile of presents for the boy and this reaction when he woke up Christmas morning:

Christmas for us has lasted three days, today being the last of the family get-together's we're attending, and the only downside has been that Alex has had to suffer three days worth of dog-related allergies of the skin rash and itchy-swollen-eyed variety.  Despite his allergies, Alex has developed a major canine crush on his uncle's Springer Spainel puppy Molly. 

John and I originally decided not to exchange gifts for each other, but John ended up getting himself a new game and some new accessories for his Wii and today I went out and bought a flash for my camera (LOVE!).  So, I guess, technically, we ended up getting gifts for ourselves anyway.  January first we go back on the "Total Money Makeover", so I guess this is the binge before the diet.

I'm looking forward to getting back to life as usual now that the holiday craziness is over.  John will be home on holiday vacation for another week, so we'll get to spend some quality family time together.  2007 was a huge year for us and I'm looking forward to another great year for 2008!

Caught in a lie

Alex and I are sitting on the sofa watching a video.  Suddenly, he let out a loud fart that actually vibrated the cushions of the couch.  I look at him and say "Alex!"  and he giggles.  A minute later, he does it again, a bigger sound that I thought possible to come out of his little butt.  "Did you fart again?" I asked him  "No."
"are you sure?"
"No"
"You farted."
"Daddy fahted" he lies.  Which normally would be a good lie because generally, if you smell something funny, it's John.  But unfortunately for Alex, John happens to be out of town today.  It's actually a shame, because these farts are the kind a father would be proud to have heard come from his son.  Chip off the old block indeed.

A couple of things...

Number one:  After my long and boring post the other day about how Alex isn't ready to potty train yet, last night, Alex followed John into the bathroom, watched him pee, then John helped Alex pee in his little potty (standing up!).  So, huh.  Ok.  I guess I've been going about this all wrong.  I think John might have to be the Potty Professor around here.  It makes sense.  The boy is ALWAYS wanting to do whatever John is doing.  I think I'll take advantage of having John home this week and have him take Alex in with him whenever he goes, see if we get anywhere or if yesterday was just a fluke.  Anyway,  YAY ALEX!  We all did a little pee-pee-in-the-potty dance around the house after John told me.

Number two:  John took me out last night on a much needed date.  I'd been craving steak (I pretty much only eat steak when I'm pregnant. I generally don't eat red meat) so he took me to the local Sizzler where I devoured a big slab o' cow, then we did some last minute holiday shopping, then he took me to a movie. 

We saw I am Legend.  It was my choice, I'm a huge Will Smith fan.  John and I both liked it, but I have to warn you, it's really intense.  I admit, I'm a huge wimp, but I surprised even myself with my level of freakout.  It's a great date movie in that I was practically perched on John's lap the whole time out of fear and we were holding hands so tight neither of us could feel our fingers when the show was over.  The movie had it's flaws in both the story and that they used CGI characters when I think more realistic rabid/vampiric humans would have been even freakier.  The ending was also strangely disappointing.  Even so, the movie is what we talked about all night long and I caught John getting up in the middle of the night frantically searching for the remote to our house's alarm system.  "I was having bad dreams"  he told me sheepishly.  I couldn't really make fun of him because earlier, I had gotten up for some water, making sure to turn every single light on in the house.  When I came back, I did a running leap onto the bed and hid under the covers.

15 weeks - looking great so far!

We went to our 15 week Dr appointment today and it went well.  We had to take Alex with us, but he was amazingly well behaved, content to eat his Yogos and keep his hands off all of the tempting equipment.  My blood work from last month came back perfect, my blood pressure is fine, the baby's heart rate is 155 which is normal and I was also relieved to confirm that I have only gained 2 pounds so far (as opposed to the 10+ pounds I'd gained by this point in Alex's pregnancy), however the doctor said "Don't worry, you'll gain a lot of weight later in the pregnancy".  Great.

I was also vindicated on two points: 

1)  I am actually "showing", not, as I'd feared, just fatter.  I'd been convinced that my existing fat was somehow just migrating upwards to my stomach.  I couldn't believe I'd really be showing this early in the pregnancy.  The doctor however, noted that my uterus is indeed "poking out", as he put it.

2) I am feeling the baby move.  I'd been telling John that I was feeling movement for the last week or so, to which he'd always respond "You just need to fart".  However, the doctor confirmed that yes, with a second pregnancy, it is very likely that I'd be feeling movement this early. 

Our next appointment is the 20 week ultrasound, scheduled next month.  John and I have a disagreement as to whether or not we will find out the gender of Baby 2.0.  I say no, he says yes.  We found out with Alex, and that was great, but I just think it would be fun to not know until it's born.  John feels very strongly that he needs to know the gender so he can start thinking of the baby as his new son or daughter.  I think he thinks it will help him bond with this baby easier.  He's suggested that he know and keep it a secret.  I think that's stupid.  If he knows, I'll want to know and he'll either slip or I'll weasel it out of him eventually.  Since John usually gets what he wants, we'll probably end up finding out the sex, though I'm going to be hard at work trying to convince him otherwise unti then.

Holiday funk

I'm officially sick of Christmas.  Admittedly, as an adult, the holiday spirit has always tended to elude me, but this year I really, really tried to find some festive for my son's sake.  We decorated the house, we (as in Alex and me) made homemade cards, we made goodies and sat on Santa's lap.  But already I can't wait to take down the tree, I've stopped plugging in the inflatable snowman that lays deflated and sad on our lawn, and I couldn't even make it through the Charlie Brown Christmas Special this year.

We missed the one and only holiday party we planned to attend last night because John was sick.  I was so disappointed about it (and the fact that I'd canceled plans that I'd been really excited about just to go to the stupid party) and still can't seem to cheer up today.

I don't know why I'm in such a funk.  Could it be the dreary weather?  The fact that I'm stuck indoors with a wild animal (Alex) all day long?  Is it because I'm disappointed that John and I aren't exchanging gifts with each other this year? Is it the pregnancy?  Is it because my underwear are too tight?

I think I just need a break.  I need to get away from the snow and the kid and the husband and the goddamned cat and all the stupid Santa's and recharge.  Unfortunately, that opportunity doesn't seem to be available to me.  In the mean time, I fear I'll just get grinchier and grinchier until not even a Reese's Peanut butter Tree can cheer me up.

Cheaper than a vasectomy

As I was peeling an orange, Alex was running across the kitchen and headbutting me while screaming with his fists in the air "I'm Mister T!".  Unfortunately, his head is just about crotch level. Fortunately, I'm a girl and it doesn't hurt.  I say to Alex, "You know, if I were a man, I'd probably be sterile by now."  Then a thought strikes, "Honey!  Come in here, Alex is doing the cutest thing.  Ok, just stand here...."

To train or not to train

I had this grand plan that before we had another child, Alex would be fully potty trained.  This plan looked easily doable when we were planning to get pregnant in the summer of 2008.  Instead, my husband sweet-talked me into letting him knock me up a full year earlier than originally planned.  This put a kink in my potty training plans because now, I've got to get Alex potty trained in six months or face two kids in diapers.

Here's the problem.  Alex doesn't seem ready yet.  He used to tell me when he pooped, but now he doesn't.  He doesn't seem to have any idea when he's peeing, unless he's out of his diaper and then he appears to intentionally pee on everything in the house.  And then there's the obsession with throwing things into and flushing the toilet.  If he is allowed full access to the toilet, we will undoubtedly have to put a plumber on retainer. 

My other concern is that if I try to get him potty trained now, I think we'll be more likely to have a relapse after the new baby is born.  I've heard and read many stories of kids having more accidents following a major life change.  I think getting a new sibling could easily qualify as a major life change for Alex.

So what do I do?  Friends of mine, experienced parents of boys similar in temperament to Alex tell me to wait.  In fact, don't even try to train him before he's three.  Then there's those who've potty trained their kids at 18 months or two years old who say it should be done now and I'm just being lazy (these are usually parents of girls incidentally). 

I've been introducing Alex to the potty for almost a year now.  We bought him his own potty chair when he was 18 months old, and he likes to go into the bathroom and sit on it when I go in to go myself.  He never makes a deposit, but at least he's not scared of it.  I've been reading books and articles on potty training and the consensus seems to be kids potty train between the ages of 2 and 4 on average and you'll have better success if you wait until he's ready instead of pushing it too early for the sake of convenience (or bragging rights: "well MY kid was using the toilet at nine months old.  clearly she's brilliant and your child is a brainless dolt.")  So here is a basic checklist for toilet training readiness  (my assessment of Alex's readiness in red):

Physical signs

• Can walk and run steadily. Walk?  Run, yes, but I haven't seen him walk since he was 18 months old.



• Urinates a fair amount at one time.  Check.



• Has regular, well-formed bowel movements at relatively predictable times.  The morning poop is predictable, but we occasionally get an unexpected poopfest in the afternoons or evenings.  I'm sure his pooping habits would be much more predictable if his eating habits were.  Which, they're not. At all.



• Has "dry" periods of at least three or four hours, which shows that her bladder muscles are developed enough to hold urine.  Sometimes.

Behavioral signs

• Can sit down quietly in one position for two to five minutes.  HA!  Ha ha ha ha ha!  You're kidding right?



• Can pull his pants up and down.  Down, yes.  Up?  But why?  That would mean he's further from being naked.



• Dislikes the feeling of wearing a wet or dirty diaper.  Dislikes wearing a diaper period.  Anything that denys him access to his beloved pee pee is of the devil as far as he's concerned, dirty or not.



• Shows interest in other's bathroom habits (wants to watch you go to the bathroom or wear underwear).  Interest is solely in what forbidden treasures can be found an played with in the bathroom cabinets while parent is on the pooper and thus, incapable of preventing bath oil from being poured on floor and tampons strewn around the room.



• Gives a physical or verbal sign when she's having a bowel movement such as grunting, squatting, or telling you.  Nope, always seems to come as a complete surprise.



• Demonstrates a desire for independence.  Oh HELL yes!



• Takes pride in his accomplishments.  Yes.



• Isn't resistant to learning to use the toilet.  Isn't resistant, but not really interested. Has on several occasions used the potty seat as a hat however.



• Is in a generally cooperative stage, not a negative or contrary one.  We're about 50/50 cooperative vs maniac on the loose

Cognitive signs

• Can follow simple instructions, such as "go get the toy."  If he feels like it, sure.



• Understands the value of putting things where they belong.  Not even a little bit.  I mean, have you seen our house?



• Has words for urine and stool. "Pee pee" and "poo poo"



• Understands the physical signals that mean he has to go and can tell you before it happens or even hold it until he has time to get to the potty.  Has not shown the slightest hint of recognizing that he needs to pee or poop.  Usually he will pee if you take his diaper off and let him run around, but then I'll find him squatting somewhere else, desperately trying to make a new puddle, not quite getting the fact that his bladder has already been emptied into his Mega blocks wagon.

I think my overall feeling is that right now, he is not ready.  He may be ready in a few months, but I really worry about trying to potty train him just before he is to become a big brother.  I think I need to just wait.  Wait until we've had this new baby.  Wait until Alex has gotten used to the new family dynamic.  Essentially, wait until he's about three, and look at the checklist again, make sure he's ready, make sure we're (or rather, I am, as we all know John is a total wuss when it comes to all things potty related) ready to commit to being consistent and follow through with Alex while we've got a screaming newborn in our arms.

It's dangerous to over baby-proof your house.  I say this because there may be a day when you're busily reading a new favorite blog while your husband is paying bills in the office, and you really should be watching your two year old, but you're downstairs and the basement is all baby-gated up like a mini Fort Knox and you never have to worry about him playing, unseen in the hallway.  Then you hear a mysterious thumping sound and you wonder, hmmm, what could he be thumping in the hallway?  And you finally get up to look only to find that the laundry room gate has been breeched and the boy is playing in the not-cleaned-in-over-a-week kitty litter box and all you can do is scream as though you've found his severed head lying on the floor prompting your husband to make a terrified dash out of the office thinking that surely the child is dead, only to find his son making a kitty litter sandcastle on the floor of the laundryroom.  Meanwhile, as husband is digesting this sight you will be frozen in place chanting, "I can't touch it, I can't touch it, I'm pregnant, I can't touch it."  "it" referring to both the litter and the child.

I tried on my swimming suit tonight and it kind of covered my prematurely burgeoning belly, but when I looked down, at my legs, GOOD GOD ALMIGHTY!  It's like some sort of freaky side show spectacle down there!  I mean, I've never had great gams, but something happened, something truly, truly wrong has happened to my thighs involving more jiggling and dimpling than I think is legal to display in most states and I fear no amount of diet or exercise can cure them.

Now that I am in the second trimester and I am feeling lots better, my helpful pregnancy newsletter tells me I may safely begin a moderate exercise routine.  Tomorrow I plan to get up early and try out the elliptical we have downstairs.  I used to do a 2 mile walk around our neighborhood, but our roads are like an ice skating rink out there and obviously way too cold for me to stroller Alex around outside.  I think the elliptical may work becuase it's low impact and I can keep my heart rate monitor on to make sure it doesn't get too fast.  I'm not going for weight loss here, but a little leg toning would do me some serious good.

It's 8:30 and The Monkey is still asleep!

Of course, he woke me up at earlierthanshit o'clock this morning crying that "Diegogo GONE!"  When I got to his bedroom I found him naked, diaper ripped off and flung onto his pillow, him and his bed soggy wet with pee and Diego Blankie was amazingly dry and right next to him.  I still don't know what he was talking about Diegogo being gone, he must have had a bad dream.  I put a fresh diaper on him, brought him to bed with me and he's still sleeping as I type this.

In other news, I've got the pregnant itchies in the worst way.  Does everyone get this?  I remember it happening last time.  I can't stop scratching.  It's like I rolled around naked in poison ivy.  My belly and boobs are the worst.  I've been itching at my right boob so much it looks like I've been attacked by a wild cat.  Anyway, just thought I'd share :)

Getting into the holiday spirit

Alex was deep in conversation with Santa and didn't want to look at the camera.  The photographer got him to look at her by sticking a feather duster in his ear.  I don't know, I kind of think a picture of him talking to Santa would have been even cuter.

Always room for it

As I was fixing Alex lunch, without warning he came up behind me and bit me on the butt cheek.  HARD.  My first reaction was "WHAT THE HELL!?!?!" and my second was, could this have something to do with his recent obsession with Jello?

What to wear, what to wear

This weekend I spent a lot of time tugging at my pants and underwear in a vain attempt to keep them from rolling down my stomach.  The baby is all of three inches long and it's already popping out all over the place.  The problem with being fat pre-pregnancy is that when I am pregnant, I don't get that cute little baby bump that those skinny types get.  No, I just expand.  There's a baby bump in there somewhere, unfortunately, it's hidden under a layer or two of blubber making me look more "Michelin man" than an expectant mommy.

I went to the mall today looking for something to wear to John's company holiday party, realizing that John's ratty snowman jammie bottoms, while festive, just wouldn't be the right look for the event.  I looked at some clothes in a bigger size than I usually wear, but nothing fit right and I hesitated to buy anything I'd likely never wear again.  I then went over to Motherhood Maternity and tried on a few tops, but they made me look really, REALLY pregnant.  I'm not ready to go around looking six months pregnant and have to explain I'm only three months along.  I did however buy a belly band that is going to make it possible for me to wear a couple of my old pre-pregnancy pants for a bit longer.  I ended up getting a black top at Target that does make me look pregnant, but not too pregnant.  If I stand up real straight, I just look fatter.  I'm going to be able to wear a brown pair of slacks I already have with my new belly band.  I won't be the best dressed, but I won't look horrible either.  That seems to be my goal these days, just don't look like shit.  Sometimes I even succeed!

I think we'll name it Maurice

After trying to get Alex to go down for a nap for 45 minutes the other day, exhausted and out of ideas, but unwilling to let the little twirp win this particular battle, I pulled out what I previously considered to be the dumbest trick in the book.  I made my hand into a "puppet" and told him (in my best hand-puppet voice) he needed to go to bed right now or else he wouldn't grow up big and strong.  Alex looked at my hand in amazement.  It was like a whole other person had walked into the room that he hadn't noticed before. 

"But why?" he asked my hand. 
"Because I said so"  My hand answered back
"No"  Alex said seriously
"It's time to go to sleep"  The hand said "If you don't go to sleep I'll go away"
"Time to sleep?" Alex asked
"Yes, time to sleep"
"No" 
"Ok, I'm leaving" my hand said and I put it behind my back
"Nooooo!  Where are you! Where are you!" Alex whined and climbed over me to look behind me.  He found my hand and forced my fingers into the hand puppet shape.  "HI!"  he told my hand
"I told you you have to take a nap." My hand told Alex in a serious tone
"take a napa" Alex said and laid down and started fake snoring ("aaahh shooo, ahhh shooo")
"Good boy" my hand said to him "Can I get a night night kiss?"
Alex turned around and kissed my hand
"Can Mommy have a kiss" I (not my hand) asked him
"No"
"Can you give your Mommy a night night kiss?"  My hand asked him
Alex gets up and gives me a smooch

He was asleep a few minutes later.

Since that afternoon, I've pulled out the hand puppet for fun a few times.  Turns out, he'll do almost anything my hand asks him to do.  Clean up his blocks, fetch things for me, let me put his clothes on without a fight.  Last night I was making him do silly things.  My hand asked him if he would go kiss his daddy's toe.  Alex looked at my hand and asked "Kiss daddy's toe?"  "Yes, go kiss Daddy's toe" my hand repeated.  Alex looked at my hand like it was crazy, but he turned around, went over to John and kissed his big toe.  John, who hadn't been listening to what we were doing looked at me "What the hell was that all about?" "I don't know" my hand said innocently.

book worm

Now that I'm feeling better and no longer have an excuse to have the TV raise my son, I've been turning it off and reading to Alex again.  I never really stopped reading to him all together, but we'd only read one or two board books and then I'd collapse in a heap on the couch and turn on another episode of Mythbusters.  This was never even close to enough reading for Alex.  Kid LOVES him some books.  He could very easily sit on the couch all day and have me read the same Tonka Town books to him for hours on end.  He's also very much into an odd little picture book called "Olson's meat pies" which I am required to read at nap time every day.   

Even though we've got a bookshelf full of books, we've read each and every one of them about 100 times each.  At least.  I can recite "Where the Wild Things Are" by memory as well as most of the "Frog and Toad Together" stories.  Honestly, I'm bored out of my mind.  Sometimes I'll try to make up a story as Alex turns the pages in his books, but he knows the stories too, and as soon as he catches on that I'm making it up, he'll turn to me and say "No.  No, no, no!" 

Yesterday we were at the library with some friends to see a puppet show.  After the show, my friend took her two boys to pick out some books from the children's section.   I don't know why it never occurred to me before, but it was like a whole new world opened up for me.  Here was an almost endless supply of new books to read.  I can just check them out!  Why, it's brilliant!  I check out books for myself almost on a weekly basis, how it never occurred to me to go into the Children's section is beyond me.  Alex indiscriminately picked out 10 books.  He was so overwhelmed with the idea that he could just grab whatever book he wanted, he began just flinging them on the floor into a pile.  I took our ten books to a table and had him pick out four to bring home.  We settled on a book about a spider, a book about a sheep, a book about Hanukkah and a Dr Seuss book about an elephant. 

Alex flipped through his books all the way home and we immediately had to read them.  The spider and Hanukkah books were duds, we're still undecided on the sheep book, but the Dr Seuss book "Horton hatches the egg" is the clear winner and we've read it five times already.  We'll be going back today to get some more Dr Seuss books. 

The only problem is if he falls in love with a particular book, I'll really have to do some convincing to get him to return it.  If there's one thing my kid can be counted on it's picking something to obsess about.  Even though we have these great new books, I had to read about Olson and his damned meat pies again last night.

With the second trimester on the horizon, things are becoming decidedly better around here.  I still have some nausea, but I'm only throwing up if I'm not diligent about not letting myself get hungry.  If I get hungry I will throw up whatever I ate last.  This makes no sense to me, but at least I know how to control it.  I get sick of eating all day so after dinner I'll usually take an anti-nausea pill which will usually help me get through the rest of the evening.

I've gained two pounds, though I look and feel like I've gained at least 10.  My clothes are getting uncomfortable and my wardrobe now consists of pajama bottoms and sweat shirts.  Like last time, I just can't stand having anything even remotely tight around my middle.  I was in maternity clothes at 14 weeks with Alex, mostly because I was working and I couldn't get away with wearing sweats all day.  I'm no where near ready for maternity clothes, but my current fashion statement isn't working for me. I'm going to buy a bella band this week and see if I resurrect some of my old pants. 

My energy is slowly returning and I'm now able to play with Alex more often.  Since it's so cold outside, we spend a lot of time building elaborate cities out of his mega blocks and driving his toy cars around.  I can tell he's thrilled to have his mommy back.  I'm thrilled to be back too.

I love you two

There are about a million reasons why two ROCKS!  Two has been by far the best age we've encountered so far.   Babyhood was nice and cute, but that half baby, half kid age from one to two nearly killed all three of us.  But two, he's now a full blown kid, and I couldn't love it more.  Yea, there's a lot more whining and tantrums and screams of "NO!! MINE!! MEANIE!! BOOBOO!" but for the most part, he's turned into a fully funtioning person who can communicate and follow directions and likes to be helpful.

My absolute favorite part of this age is he knows what he's saying.  A few months ago I could prompt him to say "I love you Mommy", but he didn't know what he was saying.  It was still cute as could be, but lacked any emotion.  Today though, today I experienced the best moment I think any parent could ever have.  I was sleeping in, John had stayed home from work and got up with Alex.  At around 8:30 or so, Alex snuck into my room, climbed up into bed with me and jumped around me saying "Mommy!  I love you Mommy!"  John came and got him and I stayed in bed another hour.  When I finally got up at 9:30, I came into the family room and Alex ran up to me and said "Mommy, I missed you!"

You pour so much love into a kid, from day one you love them non-stop and get very little back.  In the early days you have to settle for head bobbing and gas smiles, then they grow up a little and you get laughs and hugs, but when they can say it, and MEAN it, nothing is better than that.

Ick

I've been feeling pretty proud of myself lately.  I've pretty much got a handle on this stupid "morning sickness" that has been controlling my life for over a month, and I've been able to do things like, take a daily shower (It requires so much... well, standing), brush my teeth without vomiting at least once a day, go out grocery shopping and even holiday shopping!  The world is my oyster!  And then I find myself racing out of a k-mart today after buying Alex his snow boots and some big frumpy sweatshirts for me and puking in the parking lot in full view of several unsuspecting holiday shoppers.  Alex began to scream in terror and tried to run away from me.  While gagging and heaving, I chased him down, locked him in the van and continued to loose my morning donut right there beside my car.  Even more horrifying was discovering that said donut had splashed onto a neighboring car.  Luckily I carry wet wipes.  I cleaned up the mess and hightailed out of there.  Yes, my first puke-and-run incident.  Pregnancy is so undignified.

A true fan

Me:  "We are SO seeing Sweeny Todd, I am SO EXCITED!"
Him:  "What?"
Me:  "You know, the new Tim Burton / Johnny Depp movie"
Him:  "I wonder if Tim Burton knows there are other actors in the world"
Me:  "Hey, when you've found the perfect one, why mess with a good thing?"
Him:  "Hmmm"
Me:  "And it's a musical!  Oh my God, I'm so excited!  You know, I'll see anything Tim Burton does with Johnny Depp.  LOVE THEM!"
Him:  "What about 'Tim Burton's Two Hours of Anus'"
Me:  "Well, if it's Johnny Depp's anus, TOTALLY!"

favorite words and phrases Alex has been using lately

• "You okay?"  to which you are supposed to reply "I'm okay, are you okay?" and he says  "I'm okay." 



• "Watch Miffbustahs"  which means he wants me to turn on Mythbusters on the Discovery Channel



• "papayak"  dried pieces of papaya



• "Duckie fahted"  When he squeezes his rubber ducky underwater in the bathtub and it makes bubbles



• "Daddy is a piggy!"  When John steals his food and / or drinks



• "poop poop"  this is a train.  No matter how much John tries to get Alex to learn that a train is called a choo choo, Alex insists that no, it is in fact a "poop poop".  So we go on the train to the city "Ride poop poop!"  I take away a toy train "My poop poop!  Gimmie poop poop!"  or the train doesn't go anymore "Boken poop poop"

Black Friday

After waking up this morning and eating breakfast I realized that not only was I able to keep my blueberry eggos down, but I've been able to keep my blueberry eggos down for THREE WHOLE DAYS.  People, you have no idea what this means to me.  The last couple of days I've only had mild nausea easily controlled by nibbling on something throughout the day.  I feel a little more icky at night, but I'm able to take my anti-nausea / knock-me-out-for-the-next-four-hours pill and sleep most of the night without incident.

Since I was feeling so great today, I decided I'd get a jump on my Christmas shopping and maybe take advantage of some sales.  It seemed like a good idea at the time.

I dragged Alex to the local religious book store to buy some appropriately religiousy gifts for my family members of faith.  I figured I couldn't go wrong with something bibley for those crazy Christian relatives of mine.  Alex did not find this store in any way interesting or fun, which are my sentiments exactly, but at least I don't begin howling in protest the minute I set foot inside.  He did manage to glean some entertainment value out of some Book of Mormon action figures and desperately begged for me to buy him "Samuel the Lamanite" or "cape guy" as he referred to him.  My refusal to do so resulted in more howling, kicking and screaming, at which time I decided I was done.  Surprisingly, I left with nothing of real religious significance.  I bought a Hello Kitty coloring book, a rocket ship model kit, a gift card and a "Happy Holidays" sign the cashier talked me into getting for $4.

We were then off to the mall.  We worked our way through the crowds with Alex squirting people with his juice box occasionally.  I looked in almost every single store and kiosk and couldn't find a single thing I wanted to get for anybody.  After about an hour Alex was sick of sitting in his stroller so he stood up and screamed "GO HOME!  MOMMY GO HOME!!!"  He cried all the way out of the mall, through the parking lot and the entire drive home. 

Once home we had some lunch, but Alex's bad mood persisited even after John came home for his lunch hour.  Alex screamed that he wanted water.  I'd give him a glass of water, into which he'd toss a matchbox car.  (This is his thing, putting cars into glasses of water.  I don't get it.) I'd take away the cup and he'd howl at me and fall to the ground sobbing.  After John left for work again, I put him down for a nap and he passed out immediately.

I think I'm done shopping for the day.  Maybe tomorrow I'll leave Mini-Grinch at home with John and try again.

Happy Thanksgiving

I'm supposed to be in California visiting my relatives and eating my Aunt Linda's famous biscuits.  But, sadly, I didn't feel well enough to ride in a car for 12 hours each way, so I opted to stay home and be the host kitchen for my mother-in-law's Thanksgiving dinner.  I got off real easy on that one.  All I had to do was provide a reasonably clean house and buy drinks and a veggie tray.  What I didn't realize when I got up this morning to do some light housework was that my home hasn't had a thorough cleaning for over a month and every surface in my house is covered in a thick layer of yuck.  The good news is today appears to be a good day, nausea and vomiting wise, as all I've had was a little grumble in my belly.  So today, I guess I'll be thankful for that.

the crying game

I thought I remembered everything about pregnancy.  I mean, after all, I was pregnant just over two years ago.  I remembered being sick, I remembered getting huge, I remember every single detail of my labor and delivery.  But somehow I'd forgotten, or blocked out, the hormonal / emotional roller coaster that is being a pregnant woman.

I will cry at ANYTHING.  Those Fidelity commercials.  All episodes of "A Baby Story".  That article in Time magazine about Hillary Clinton.  Just last night John got me a green twin Popsicle out of the freezer and broke it in half for me on the corner of the counter.  My eyes welled up with tears because I couldn't believe he'd be so sweet as to do that for me.

At the same time, however, I've got a short fuse on my anger.  Unfortunately, John gets the brunt of it.  Of course.  I remember last week actually yelling at John because he wasn't sick.  I mean really, it's HIS baby too.  The least he could do is be a little bit miserable.  Here I am, throwing up every day, so nauseated I can barely move and he's feeling well enough to play racquetball!  That bastard!

The good news is I'm lucky enough to have a husbad who loves me anyway.  Despite my manic moods.  Which, of course makes me cry. 

Looking good

We had our first doctor appointment for the pregnancy this morning.  I asked John to come with me because, frankly, I'm a nervous wreck when I'm pregnant.  I can't help but imagine all manner of horrible things being wrong with the baby, if there is a baby at all.  I know better than to do this.  It serves no purpose other than to make me stress out, but I do it anyway.  I was like this when I was pregnant with Alex too.  Interestingly, our first pregnancy, the one I miscarried, I was cool as can be.  Which made it all the more shocking to have it end like it did.

So we're in the waiting room and I'm trying to fill out some paperwork, and my hands are shaking.  I can't remember any answers to the questions on the form.  I can't remember how much Alex weighed when he was born, or what insurance I have.  What's my middle initial again?  Finally we're called in and led to the ultrasound room.  We're told I don't need to have an internal exam and John breathes a sigh of relief that he doesn't have to witness anyone poking around my nethers for a few more months.

As soon as the ultrasound probe touches my stomach, we see the baby immediately.  It's wiggling it's little arms and legs and it actually looks like a tiny miniature baby. This is a stark contrast to Alex who at his 10 week ultrasound made absolutely no movement whatsoever.  Alex looked like a little blob of gum with a flashing white dot for a heart.  We couldn't tell his head from his butt at 10 weeks.  This baby, with the waving and kicking, it was obvious.  Any worries or concerns about this pregnancy were instantly washed away.  Clearly, this kid, it's gonna be just fine.  Though, as my mom pointed out, if it's this hyper in utero, we're in serious trouble when it's a toddler!  And I thought I had my hands full with Alex!

Our official due date is June 16th.  John's excited about the prospect of sharing his birthday (June 17th) with his youngest child.  I'm obviously thrilled to know that I've got a real live (and kicking!) baby growing in there.  Even though I've been so sick, and to be honest, wondering why in the world I did this again on purpose, now, I'm excited.  I remember now why it's worth it.

A nice routine

Finally.  I've finally gotten a handle on this stupid morning sickness.  It's not over, oh no, not by a long shot, but I have managed to work out a nice system that seems to make the whole ordeal much more bearable.  It goes something like this:

• Wake up, walk sleepily to bathroom sink, dry heave



• Walk to kitchen, make Alex a breakfast shake, vomit bile into kitchen sink



• Sit on couch and watch Arthur



• At some point before Curious George comes on, dry heave into kitchen sink one more time



• Eat a bowl of Cocoa Pebbles



• Sit completely still on sofa until the end of Clifford the Big Red Dog (or if I'm feeling particularly sick, until after Super Why) while sipping ice water through a straw



• Start day making sure to eat something every hour on the hour until 6PM at which time eat nothing but Popsicles until bedtime.

Needless to say, Alex has become a television addict and I have gained back that five pounds I'd lost.  The good news is, I'm whining a lot less.  It's a worth while trade off I think.

Noodle of doom

Last night Alex and I were at a restaurant with my in-laws.  Alex was eating spaghetti (or "aggedee") while sitting on my lap.  After a while he started rubbing his nose.  Then he started to sneeze.  Big boogery sneezes with big boogery bubbles.  He kept up the sneezing throughout the rest of the dinner, continued on our drive home, and after we got home.  I figured he was having some allergic reaction to something.  It was getting so bad, I decided I couldn't put him to bed in this condition.  He was sitting on the couch with his lap full of tissues, boogers a-flowing.  This continued for an hour and I started thinking I should run to the store for some Benadryl until suddenly he gave a big sneeze and a noodle, a three-inch-long spaghetti noodle, flew out of his nose and landed on the floor like a slimy boogery  worm.  Alex rubbed his nose, gave a satisfied sigh and flopped back on the couch.  I just looked at the noodle in disbelief.  How in the world could he have threaded a three-inch long noodle into his nose without me noticing? 

The things I do...

When Alex gets a "boo boo" (and he gets a lot of them), he immediately announces "BOO BOO!!" and runs over, presents the boo boo to either John or me and asks us to "kiss boo boo".  Some boo boo's only require a small peck, while more painful boo boo's require quite a bit of smooching to fix.  I like this arrangement.  Not only is is insanely cute, but it helps him get over his boo boos fairly quickly.  The crying almost always ends just before the last kiss is planted.  I didn't think there was a possible downside.  That is, until he bit his tongue today and followed me around with his drooly and bloody tongue hanging out demanding "Kith boo boo tongue KITH BOO BOO TONGUE!"

Of course I did.  He's my son, and he needed his mommy's magic boo boo fixing kisses.  But, eeew.

No NaBloPoMo for me :(

I so wanted to participate in NaBloPoMo this month, however, I've decided since I can't even manage to take a shower every day recently, posting on my blog every day would be next to impossible.  That and every post would likely say something like:

I'm sick.  Sick, sick, sick.  I'm never, ever, ever, ever, ever getting pregnant ever, ever, ever, ever again.  Ever. 

On that note, I have to say that this "morning sickness" has gotten completely out of hand.  It went from uncomfortable but manageable, to miserable but manageable for small periods of time to complete and total misery 24 hours a day.  It's gotten so bad that today I called my doctor and was given a presciption for an anti-nausea medication.  I took it an hour ago and while I still feel nauseated, I have managed to keep a cup of chicken noodle soup down so far. It's got to be part sleeping pill though, because I am having serious trouble keeping my eyes open right now.

I've lost five pounds in the last two weeks, which isn't all that uncommon for early pregnancy, but for me, it's very strange.  I gained 10 pounds in the first trimester with Alex.  This tells me I really must be feeling much worse this time around and I'm not just being wimpy.

Anyhow, posting will likely be light until I start feeling a little bit better. 

He speaks!

In what felt like overnight, Alex went from speaking garbled baby-talk with only a few mumbled semi-coherent words mixed in,  to speaking in near complete sentences.  In fact, he is almost speaking English fluently.  I am enjoying this language explosion immensely.  I've decided that nothing is cuter than a toddler trying to make a whole sentence.

"Cars is fun fast"
"want great toy" (as opposed to the million not-great toys he has)
"Caden fall over ok" (Caden fell over, but he's ok)
"Aggetti yum yum food yes" (I like spaghetti)
"Side down poopie ouch poopie" (I went down the slide, then pooped, the poop hurts my bum, please change me)

Ok, well, maybe I'm still the only one who can understand him, but it's getting better!

Did I say I was only half as sick as last time?  HA!  I'm at least as sick or worse than I was with Alex's pregnancy.  I'm certainly more wimpy about it this time around.  I think what's making it so hard on me is that it's only been two weeks, I probably have another four months of feeling like shit to go.  That's a long time!

I suppose the good news is that I'm too busy feeling crappy to worry at all about the possibility of miscarrying the pregnancy.  And, for me, I'd still take throwing up over worrying any day. 

Gratuitous photo montage

The pregnancy hormones made me do it.  It's embarassingly sappy.  I don't care.

Alex's first year:

Helpless

Several members of my family in California were forced to evacuate their homes due to the out of control wildfires.  Among the relatives evacuated were my uncle, who's home in Rice Canyon he spent the better part of 30 years building himself, and my grandmother who's in her 80's.  Her whole life was in her home. 

Obviously, the most important thing, for which we are all grateful, is that they all escaped injury and are safe, staying with other relatives in the area.  Word from the grapevine is that Grandma's home is gone, her entire mobile home park incinerated by the fire. (This is a picture of a home from her mobile home park during the fire).  No word yet on my uncle's house.

My first instinct is to throw Alex in the car and drive down to be with my family, to help in any way I can.  Help dig through rubble to find anything that can be salvaged.  However, better judgment kicks in when I realize that a freshly burned trailer park is no place for a two year old to run around, and I wouldn't be of much help if I'm chasing Alex.  Not to mention I'm in no condition to be lifting heavy objects or inhaling smoke and ash being pregnant.  Even just being there for moral support isn't realistic due to there being nowhere for me to stay.  Hotels are full of evacuee's and my relatives in the area's guest rooms and sofas are occupied with my evacuated relatives and possibly their own friends and families who may have had to flee.  So I'm left here to worry and wait for any news and feel utterly helpless to help my loved ones.

I naively thought that not working during this pregnancy would make dealing with the first (and very likely second) trimester nausea a breeze.  In some ways it is easier.  I'm not having to throw up in a zip lock bag in my car during rush hour traffic.  I don't have to puke in a public toilet or in the trash can at my desk.  What I didn't really consider is that being home with a toddler who still poops in his pants isn't making the nausea any easier to bear. 

It's not just wiping poop out of the creases of Alex's scrotum that is making me sick, even just changing a wet diaper makes me gag.  The smell of macaroni and cheese (Alex's lunch of choice) makes me dry heave.  Rocking Alex to sleep for his nap gives me motion sickness. It's also the fact that he thinks I'm a human jungle gym.  Having 25 pounds of solid toddler jump on me when I'm not sick is actually quite enjoyable, but when my stomach is queasy and my boobs are swollen and sore, it's not a picnic.   

There's also the guilt of not having the energy to play with Alex all day.  I'm days behind in laundry. I've stopped cooking and my family is living on fast food.  For the last three days I've let Alex run around the house in his jammies all day until I change him into clean jammies at night which doesn't really matter since he hasn't had a bath since last week.

Don't get me wrong though, it's not that bad.  I'm really only half as sick as I was with Alex, which is a relief.  And I'd rather be sick and feel like the pregnancy is going well than feel fine and wonder the whole time if I'm still pregnant.  And I don't for one second take for granted how lucky I am to be able to be home with Alex, to be pregnant with a new baby and have a husband who comes home after a long day of work with a sack of hamburgers and a kiss for his wife who hasn't showered in a couple of days.  Life is good.

Now these are missionaries I'd happily invite in for a talk

Why didn't anyone give me this for my birthday? 

Good news and bad news

Well, it's begun.  I'm five and a half weeks pregnant and "morning sickness" has started to kick in.  Up until today, I've been feeling perfectly fine, just some minor pregnancy symptoms like being tired, sore boobs and a real sensitive sense of smell.  Today however, I'm having a hard time getting off the couch, I'm more tired than ever and nauseous.  Thank goodness for Go, Diego Go!  Alex is happy as a clam laying on the floor watching TV while I'm trying to decide how many episodes we can watch before it's officially worse to watch Diego than get off my butt and start cleaning the house.

The good news is being sick is a pretty good sign that the pregnancy is going well.  The bad news is, I'm still sick.

Alex and I just got out of the shower and were in the bathroom.  I'm blowdrying my hair while he's busying himself arranging the stuff on top of the toilet (extra toilet paper, wet wipes, his lotion and soap).  I finish my hair and look at him and he's all shiny.  His hair is wet again and sticking straight up and his face, belly, hands and arms are covered in some sort of clear goo.  I take a closer look at what he was playing with to find he's covered himself in soap. 

Since Alex has eczema, he has to use Cetaphil soap and lotion, both of which come in pump bottles.  After a bath or a shower, I always rub him down with a liberal amount of lotion to keep his skin from getting too dry.  The lotion and soap bottles look identical except one is green (lotion) and one is blue (soap).

Since we were in a hurry this morning, I didn't lotion him up after his shower, so he took it upon himself to take care of it while I was busy doing my hair.  The bad news is he'd mistaken the soap for the lotion.  The good news, he's really, really clean.

Best Shot Monday

I just got a new lens for my birthday, a 50mm f/2.5 Compact Macro.  I'm trying to learn how to use it and took the opportunity to test it out on my sleeping son.

Country livin'

Alex and I were on our morning walk, and up ahead we saw a man trying to walk what, from a distance, appeared to be a large black dog.  He was having a time of it, the "dog" was scared of everythng from passing cars to dead leaves blowing by.  As they got closer, I realized that it wasn't a dog, but a baby bull.  Having never seen anyone taking a bull out for a morning stroll on a leash before, I had to take a picture.

Fertile Myrtle

What did you do this weekend?  I didn't do much, just took a little test:

Looks like I passed :)

We're thrilled.  I only just went off birth control mid August, so it happened quicker than expected.  John for his part has spent the weekend with his chest puffed out grunting "Me big strong man.  Me put baby in woman's belly" all the while pounding his chest. Ok not really, but he's quite proud of the fact that he so quickly and easily impregnated me with his fertile seed.  To hear him tell the tale, he knocked me up from across the room just by thinking about it.

Of course, we've been down this road before.  Twice to be exact.  Only once reaching the finish line with a healthy baby.  So our excitement is tempered by the reality that it's still very early in this pregnancy and we know all too well what could happen in the coming months.  That said, however, I've decided to be nothing but positive about this pregnancy, as I have no real good reason to believe that I won't end up the proud mother of a brand new son or daughter come June 2008. 

One of those days when it's just not worth changing out of my jammies

Last night, John gathered up a groggy Alex off my lap to take him upstairs to bed when Mount Vesuvius erupted out of Alex's belly covering John in a thick layer of Alex's dinner.  I took Alex up to soak him in the tub and left John dry-heaving over the sink in the basement.  Once Alex and John were cleaned up, and I had scrubbed the last bit of the regurgitated french fries and chicken nuggets out of the carpet, I threw their soiled clothes along with a soggy Diego Blankie in the wash.

We snuggled Alex into bed with us, even though prior to and even after the vomit-fest he didn't act sick at all.  He fell asleep easily and about an hour or so later, I carried him into his own room and settled him into his bed with a replacement blankie.  His former favorite pre-Diego rocket ship blankie.

5:00 AM, I heard Alex get out of bed and run into the family room.  I got out of bed and went after him to find him sobbing about his "car cake".  Car Cake is what he's calling the Cars (the movie) birthday candle he demanded I buy for him yesterday at the store.  He immediately broke it in two and carried both pieces around all day.  He'd left it somewhere downstairs the night before the puking incedent.  I told him it was too late to go find Car Cake and we had to go back to bed.  I took him to bed and he proceeded to scream bloody murder about Car Cake being gone and broken.  Sob sob, scream, scream "Car cake broken! Car cake gone!"  repeat.  The Car Cake scream-a-Thorn soon included hysterical cries for Diego Blankie, which was sitting wet in the washer downstairs.   He soon got very dramatic about it, saying things like "Diego Blankie Died!  Diego Blankie all gone!  Diego Blankie Broken!  Diego Blankie Boo Boo!"  This went on for who knows how long before  I decided to go hunt down Bunny, another old favorite from the pre-Diego days.  Bunny seemed to do the trick and Alex finally fell asleep.

When we woke up this morning, it was Grump-fest 2007.  We immediately went downstairs to find Car Cake and transferred Diego Blankie to the drier.  Once Diego Blankie was warm and dry, and Alex wrapped himself up in it like a burrito while watching Go Diego Go, I figured we could finally start our day.  I was wrong.  Nothing made him happy, he refused to wear clothes, although he insisted on wearing a Cars Pull-up over his regular diaper.  I broke out the play dough and made balls for him out of the hot pink dough, which he'd immediately squish and scream at me that "Baseball broken!  Touchdown broken!"  and demand I reshape them, then immediately squish them again followed by more whining.  I made his favorite meal for lunch.  Spaghetti and Parmesan cheese.  He ate it all, then complained that his hands were messy, then complained that his Cars pull up was dirty.  I took the Pull up off and fell to the floor in despair. 

It's only noon and I have little hope it will get better.  He just came over pointing to a spot on his knee crying "Boo Boo GONE!" having discovered that his skinned knee has healed.  It's going to be a very long day.

Best Shot Monday

This was one of my favorites from the other day when I was trying to take a portrait of Alex.

Versitility of the Boppy

Did you know that a Boppy pillow isn't only great for nursing?  It also works beautifully as a laptop pillow with nice comfy arm rests.

Inappropriate observations

We're at the doctor's office for Alex's two year checkup.  The doctor comes in, hugely pregnant.  Alex loves his doctor and is very comfortable with her.  He crawls up into her lap and starts poking her belly.  "Belly button" he says to her.  "There's a baby in my belly" she tells him.  He rubs her belly gently and says "baby".  Then, out of nowhere he pokes her in the boob and declares "BOOBIES!  Big Boobies!"

"He's been learning about body parts" I say, embarassed

"I love my job" she tells me, laughing.

Alex, two years in "official" pictures

I like to have an "official" picture for every big age. 

We had the official newborn

We had the official three months (which I unfortunately have misplaced the CD containing the larger versions of these pictures):

The official six months:

The official nine months:

And the official one year:

I have to admit, I've never been completely satisfied with any of his official portraits.  I took him to a popular children's portrait studio hoping they'd be able to finesse a smile out of him, being professionals and all, and, strictly speaking, they did, albeit a fake smile.  My overall feeling of these pictures is he looks like a bit of a dork.  A cute dork, mind you, but still a dork.  Which is a shame because I dropped at least $200 for a sitting and prints for each one.  His one year photo is the only one I really like.

This year I decided I would do my best to capture an "official" portrait of two year old Alex myself.  This task proved harder than I anticipated as all I've been able to take pictures of lately is the back of his head as he runs away.  But I was on a mission.  I dressed him up and took him out to the International Peace Gardens and spent an hour and a half chasing him around and tried to coax a real smile out of him.   By the end of our adventure, he and I were covered in dirt and I'm pretty sure he'd eaten about a half dozen pebbles, but we got this:

I had it printed out at Inkleys (by far the best when it comes to printing digital photos) and hung it up on our wall.  I love it.  He's cute, he's smiling, and it only cost me $15 to print out 2-8x10's, 3-5x7's and a 4x6. 

To see the other pictures from our adventures in toddler portrait photography, go here:

Happy Second Birthday!

Dear Alex,

I wanted to write you a mushy letter to tell you how wonderful you are.  I wanted to write all about how you amaze me every day.  I wanted to tell you how proud I am to be your mom.  How every single day you're changing and growing and learning and how lucky I feel to get to see it first hand.  I want to write about how every night when you, me and Daddy are cuddling before bed, you make sure to point to all our body parts; nose, eyes, ears, hair, chin, elbow, knee, boobies, bellybutton... just to make sure we know that you know what they all are. 

But all that will have to wait because you're squatting right next to me and doing the "poop grunt" and it's beginning to stink in here.

I love you Monkey.  Happy Birthday!

Indecent exposure

Alex and I are at Kid to Kid and Alex is in the back playroom while I'm browsing.  Finding nothing I want to buy, I go to the back to get him and find a pile of clothes in the middle of the room, a used diaper flung in a corner and my son buck nekkid playing with a little piano while two other (fully clothed) toddlers dance along to the music.

Buried under mound of toys...Send help!

Alex had his second birthday party yesterday.  I'd planned to have just a family party.  Wanted to keep it casual and small.  What I didn't count on is the fact that John and my families mission appears to be to spoil my son completely rotten.  It's like a toy bomb went off in our house and we're still trying to find the floor in the living room (aka "Ground Zero" for present opening).

Everyone was incredibly generous and Alex, who prior to yesterday was only slightly spoiled, is now spoiled beyond reason.

As always, his personal paparazzi captured the whole day.  See my Flickr set here.  And Grandma Jen's here.

Kids say the darndest things

We're driving around in our van with our friends and their three year old daughter when she pipes up and says "I love you John!"
John:  "Well thanks Regan, I think you're great too!"
Regan:  "It's dark out"
John:  "You're right, it is dark"
Regan:  "It's dark like your soul"
John: ...

My weekend

As the parasite invaded both my husband and my son the last few weeks, I began to get downright cocky about the fact that I hadn't so much as burped yet.  I was sure that it wouldn't get me.  I was religious about washing my hands after changing Alex's diapers, and when both the boys started to get better and I still hadn't manifested any symptoms, I really believed I was free and clear.

Then it got me.  Saturday morning I woke up nauseated, by afternoon I had debilitating stomach cramps requiring me to make use of the Lamaze breathing that had seemed so useless during Alex's delivery.  By Saturday night I'd thrown up everything I'd eaten all day.  I spent all day Sunday either in the bathroom or lying in bed clutching my bottle of Pepto Bismol and moaning about how miserable I was.  I also apologized profusely to John for having made fun of his being a wimp when he had the bug.  I didn't know it felt like this!

Today, thanks to Imodium and witch hazel pads, I'm feeling much better.  My tummy is still very, very angry, but I am mobile and it seems, on the mend.  I hope. 

What happens when you let a 2 year old pick out his own outfit

This isn't bad, but we're missing a crucial part of the ensemble, pants:

And this gem, consists of nothing but socks and babylegs.  Very creative!

Because I couldn't train him to say "twenty three and one half months"

Coming to terms with the mini van

There it is.  Our new car.

No, you're not seeing things, it's a mini van.

Oh.
My.
God.

I drive a mini van!

Even worse?  I LOVE IT!

We've been talking for a long time, at least two years, about getting a new (used) car.  Both our cars were still in fairly good condition, but were getting old, and our Mazda Protege in particular was beginning to feel very cramped since we had Alex.  This wasn't really a problem until John broke his hand and could no longer drive a stick shift, forcing Alex and me out of my lovely Dodge Stratus and into the itsy bitsy teeny weeny Protege full time. 

I've wanted a Toyota Prius for years now, we even went so far as to go look at them with intentions to buy, but chickened out at the price tag.  I swore up and down my next car would be a hybrid of some sort and I'd never, ever, ever, ever drive a gas guzzling SUV.  But then I realized that another sedan would just give me as much room as our Protege or Stratus.  We borrowed our sister-in-law's  Rav4 when we went to San Diego and discovered that a small SUV isn't going to give us much more cabin space either.  I began to do some casual research on smaller SUV's with third row seats, but found that the third row of seats don't offer much, if any, leg room for passengers forced to sit in the back and also, when we have a second child and subsequently, a second car seat, it would have to be completely removed in order to allow people to climb back there.  That's when we started to notice mini vans. 

I'd never considered a mini van.  Mini vans are for families with lots of kids.  Mini vans are for Mormons.  Mini vans are... well, they're dorky and big and the exact opposite of anything that could be considered hip and young.  Then it occurred to me.  Neither John nor I are hip and we're most certainly not getting any younger.  We are in fact, a little dorky and big.  We have a family that will eventually expand, maybe not to Mormon proportions, but almost definitely to two kids.  Maybe a mini van is what we need.  So, I did some research.  Guess what?  Mini vans are cheaper than SUV's.  Mini vans get better gas mileage.  Mini vans are roomier and have more versatile seating options.  Mini vans are... kinda cool!

I began to get a little discouraged however, because I couldn't find any style mini van in our price range that didn't look like a road barge.  I tried to visualize myself zooming around town in a Dodge Grand Caravan, and I got a little sad.  Then I found it.  It was without a doubt a mini van, but it was smaller, shorter, more compact.  It was almost cute even.  Best yet, it was the right price.  It was a Mazda MPV. 

We found a potential candidate for sale on line and went to test drive it.  I sat in the middle seat with Alex and John drove.  It was comfortable. It was roomy.  It had a smooth drive.  All three of us fell in love.  We traded in John's Protege and came home the proud new owners of a silver 2004 Mazda MPV.

I hate you Cryptosporidium

After the doctor told us on Monday Alex "just had a stomach virus" and not the dreaded "pool parasite" so many kids have become unwilling hosts of, I was relieved that we were looking at two or three days of vomiting and diarrhea and we could then return to our normal lives. 

Today marks day number six at casa de poop n puke and Alex is beginning to look emaciated.  He's always been skinny, but now you could slice cheese on his collarbones.  I called the doctor this morning to ask what the f***k was going on in my son's tummy and why the hell it wasn't going away.  I was then told that yea, he's probably got Cryptosporidiosis and there's not much we can do about it other than let it just run it's course which could take ANOTHER WEEK!  In another week, Alex will be so thin he could fall through the floorboards. 

The good news is that if he isn't vomiting, I can feed him.  Which I haven't been able to do all week, but apparently can begin doing now that it's only coming out the back end.  The bad news is, he doesn't really feel like eating anything but bread.  Which, I guess is better than nothing, but I'm desperatly holding back the urge to hold him down and stuff him with Hostess Cupcakes before he wastes away to nothing.

Update

Alex is feeling better.  YAY!

John is home sick.

My own tummy is gurgling ominously. I'm pretty sure I'll be spending my evening with the toilet one way or another.

Sick day

While I spent my weekend at a Parelli seminar (which just stoked the already burining flames of my desire to once again be a horse owner) Alex quietly contracted a stomach bug which required a trip to the doctor this morning.  He's not holding anything down, not even water or saltine crackers, and even woke up with a dry diaper, raising a huge red flag regarding dehydration.  I'm giving him little sips of gatorade every 10 minutes or so and letting him nibble a bit on crackers when the desire strikes.

I hate it when Alex is sick, any parent hates it when their child is miserable and there's nothing they can do about it.  I'm very lucky though, unlike some kids who get cranky and mean while sick (like me), Alex just gets sweet and cuddly (like his dad).  He turns into a calm little love bug who just wants to be held all day long.

One of the drawbacks of having Alex in a big boy bed

The newest entry in Alex's baby book:

Baby's first time walking in on his parents having, um... relations
August 22, 2007

Let's just say, that a tug at the sheets and a whisper of "mommy?" was not what I was hoping for immediately post coitus.  We're not really sure how long he was standing there at the foot of the bed.  Luckily it was dark and thankfully, he's still young enough to not have to do much more explaining than "don't worry sweetie, Mommy didn't hurt Daddy.  Daddy was just really happy"

What a difference a couple of months make

A few months ago I took Alex to a place called Kangaroo Zoo where there were about a dozen inflatable bounce houses and slides.  Alex had a ball.  Running around like a maniac, making sure to go on every single activity at least five times.  He went through mazes, he slid down slides, he bounced until he couldn't bounce anymore.  It was such a success, that when a friend of mine asked if we wanted to go with her and her boys this morning, I jumped at the chance.

Alex was excited to go.  All morning, I'd ask him "Are you ready to bounce?" and he'd jump up and down saying "boing boing".  I was excited.  The last few days Alex has been such a cranky pants.  Throwing tantrums at the drop of a hat and pulling his patented "boneless legs" trick when trying to take him home from the park.  He's also getting very aggressive with other kids.  Sure, he's aggressively HUGGING them, but still, unwanted hugs can cause problems.  I figured a day at Kangaroo Zoo would give him an opportunity to run wild and scream and burn off some of that excess energy.  He'd have so much fun, he wouldn't want to waste any time throwing a tantrum.

I was wrong.

It started out great, he ran for the first bounce house and "boing boing"ed happily with his buddies.  Then he got out and made a bee line for the two and under section.  That's where it all went to hell.  Kangaroo Zoo has a sectioned off area for littler kids to play.  Filled with toys and cars and big pillows and puzzles.  This is great, because Alex can go in there and play with some toys when he gets sick of getting pushed around by the bigger kids in the bounce houses.  The bad part is, when he wants to get out, he wants to take the toys with him.  This isn't allowed.  This rule pisses Alex off to no extent.

He'd leave the play area, toy cars in hand, running for the nearest inflatable slide.  I'd go running after him, take the cars away and he'd scream at me, fall on his back and howl.  I'd pick him up, tell him that I understand he wants the toy, and he can have it in the play area.  He'd take the toy, I'd put him in the play area, he'd escape again, and throw the fit again.  Play this scenario on a loop for two hours and toss in a liberal amount of kicking, screaming, crying and throwing of said cars, and you'd have a good picture of what our morning at Kangaroo Zoo was like.

We finally left at noon, both of us covered in tears and snot, Alex still screaming about the fact that he did not have the toys in his hands.  I gave him a package of fruit snacks which he threw one by one in my general direction until they were gone, finally passing out about halfway home.

I'm beginning to realize that they weren't kidding about the "Terrible Twos".  My son is a grumpy little troll most of the time, with the occasional up mood swing when the planets are aligned just so.  Fun things are no longer fun.  He reacts to previous favorite foods as if they were poison.  I'm at a loss as to what to do.  My Positive Parenting book tells me to acknowledge and validate his feelings, and give him extra hugs and most of all smile, speak lovingly to him and simply redirect his attention to something else.  Redirection PISSES HIM OFF.  Alex knows what he wants, and I'm no longer able to distract him with a shiny object or odd looking kitchen utensil.  Not even a similar toy will do.  He wants THAT car.  THAT car with the STRIPES.  The YELLOW stripes, not the BLACK stripes and Oh my GOD, how DARE you try to trick me with the car with the yellow stripes and the blue bumpers when I've clearly indicated that I wanted the car with the yellow stripes and the green bumpers, you horrible beast of a woman!  Giving in to his demands only intensifies the tantrum because I WANT BOTH CARS!  WHY DON'T YOU LOVE ME?  WWWWWAAAAAAAA!!!

I'm scared of Two.  Somebody, please hold me.

I haven't been posting a lot lately.  Partly because there's nothing much to write about lately and partly because of a certain child who is stuck to me like super glue.  Also, I just sent my laptop off to the doctor because a few keys have popped off (requiring a whole new keyboard!) making it doubly hard to detach myself from the monkey for a few minutes downstairs with our neglected desktop computer.

Alex and I are trying to soak up the last of the summer sunshine, making trips to any and all sprinklers and muddy puddles available within a 10 mile radius of our house.  Alex is such a water kid, I'll probably sign him up for swimming lessons this winter at the indoor pool. 

Autumn is fast approaching, which also will signal the official arrival of the "Terrible Two's" come Alex's birthday in September.  I've been getting a preview the last couple of days, and I have to tell you, it's looking like it will be a wild ride.  Some days I feel like I'm training for the pig wrestling championships. 

The second we hit the park every day, my son goes off running with a pack of wild boys, throwing sand, stealing other people's snacks and screaming like a howler monkey from the top of the playground structure.  Alex comes home from the park looking like Pigpen from Peanuts, oftentimes a new rip in his clothing, mud caked in his hair and peanut butter smeared across his cheeks and a few runny boogers snaking their way to his lips, always requiring a minimum of a hose down in the sink.  It's exhausting, these park outings, but I am grateful for the opportunity to let him burn off some steam every day.  God help us when we're stuck inside for the winter.  I really don't know what we're going to do.

Manipulation

He has recently discovered that saying "peees"  (please) will get him anything he wants.  If, for some reason, "peees" doesn't get him what he wants, he'll say "pitty peees" (pretty please).  That always works.  I mean, could YOU say no to "pitty peees"?

Mama's boy

I don't know if it's the age or the fact that we spend so much time together, but Alex is really becoming a mamas boy all of a sudden.  He's never been a particularly clingy kid.  Always happy to be with other people, or playing.  But lately, it's all me, all the time.  He wants to be held, ALL THE TIME.  Not even just when we're out.  At home too.  He wants to be held while I'm cooking dinner.  He wants to sit on my lap when I'm trying to go to the bathroom.  It's like I forgot to put fabric softener in the laundry and he's sticking to me like static cling.

He won't even go to John, much to John's dismay.  It doesn't help that I've been giving John grief about being a lazy dad, the only time he spends time with Alex is if I am unavailable and then it's just Alex running around while John watches TV, occasionally shouting "don't climb on that!" from the sofa.  Now John thinks Alex doesn't like him because Alex only wants me.  In some ways, it's payback.  Alex had always been more of a Daddy's boy in the past.  I do all the work, and John was getting all the love.  Now the work to love ratio is skewed in the other direction and I'm feeling a little bit smothered. 

I'm wondering if it has anything to do with my parenting style lately.  I've recently read a book about positive discipline and Alex's clingyness seems to coincide with about the time that I started implementing some of the suggestions from the book.  Maybe he's just responding to my more positive attitude.

I'm sure Alex will go back to being a Daddy's boy soon enough though.  In the meantime, I'm going to enjoy the extra snuggles while I can.

Recall close calls

Last week I had to toss a few cans of green beans because of potential botulism contamination.  Today, I found out about the Mattel/Fisher Price recall because of lead paint.  Imagine my horror when I saw this on the recall list:

This happens to be Alex's favorite bath toy.  So favorite in fact that both Elmo and Cookie monster are missing their eyes and most of their clothes because Alex CHEWED OFF THE PAINT! 

After taking a moment to overreact, and briefly consider gouging the eyes out of a Mattel voodoo doll, I calmed down enough to look further into the situation and breathe a sigh of relief that the recall affects only toys purchased AFTER May 2007.  Alex has had his Tub Sub longer than that.

I'm tossing it anyway.

I was also sad to see several Go Diego Go toys on the list.  A couple of those I'd planned to get for Alex's birthday next month.