It's what the cool kids are wearing

John and I were out shopping yesterday and John mentioned that he needed some new jeans.  So we made our way to the mens section of the department store we were in and found the denim section. 

"These look good" John said, pointing to a display
"Oh, Honey, you're not hip enough to pull those off" I told him
"But look at the price, they're cheap!"
"Yea, because they're ripped!  Look"

I kept going on and on about these strange wide belts, and do men really wear boot cut?  And why are they ripped? And they look dirty.  If you want dirty pants, just wear the ones you've got for a few weeks, they'll look the same as these right here!

I pointed John to a pair of crisp dark blue jeans with a straight leg and a high waist.  I'm sure if he'd have tried them on, he could have pulled them up to his nipples, Urkle style if there ever were any.

John took a pair of the "dirty" pants and a pair of less hip, yet less dorky than the Urkle pants to the dressing room, and on the way there I babbled on about these shirts!  What is with these shirts?  Who wears this stuff?  This shirt here?  With the print on the chest?  It's a button down! I don't get it.   

I sounded like my dad anytime he took me shopping as a teenager.  Kids these days.  You call these clothes?  You call this a style?  That's too tight!  That's falling off!  Do people wear that color in public these days?

It's no secret that I have NO fashion sense at all.  None.  I don't even have out dated fashion sense.  I wear pants and shirts.  As plain and as style free as possible.  Part of it is because I'm fat, and wearing anything that calls attention to me, calls attention to my fat.  Part of it is also because, I suspect, I'm getting old.  I used to go shopping and wish I could buy all the cute clothes.  Now I go out and struggle to find something that doesn't cause me to laugh uncontrollably, because I'm supposed to WEAR that?  I'm incredibly practical.  That short sleeved sweater?  But what if my arms get cold?  will a scarf tied around my neck keep me warm if I'm just wearing a t-shirt? I truly don't understand wearing something simply for the look.

John came out of the dressing room and said he liked the "dirty" pants.  I looked at them again and thought they weren't so bad.  At least he can wear them a few times before I had to wash them, no one would know the difference.