Dirty Old Woman

I feel like I'm the only person in the world who isn't loving the Twilight series.  I'm only reading them because we're discussing all four books in November for my book club.  Otherwise, I'd have read the first book and left it at that.  Twilight was fine.  It wasn't great, but it was better than I expected. Though, I have to admit, my expectations were historically low.  When you hand me a book and say "Hey! This was written by a Mormon housewife! It's about teenage vampires in love!" it doesn't encourage me to dive right in. Plus, I'm a little old for these books. I got them from the library, and you should have seen me trying to sneak out of the young adult section unnoticed with a stack of five 500 plus page books in my arms.

I finished New Moon last night, and it was, I am not kidding, 500 pages of Bella whining about Edward.  Boo HOO! Edward left me!  BOO HOO! I want to die!  BOO HOO my new boyfriend is a werewolf!  My werewolf boyfriend and my vampire boyfriend are blood enemies! WAH! SOB! WHINE!  By the end of the book I turned to John (who'd been waiting up for me to finish the book with the hopes that "hot teenage vampire lovin'" was going to turn into him getting some last night) and said "Wow, I'm glad that's over.  Gotta psych myself up for the next two.  Ugh"

Maybe it's because I'm not a romantic.  Maybe it's because I'm not a teenager.  Maybe it's because I just don't like book series' in general.  Hell, it took me FIVE books before I really got into Harry Potter.  And I forced my way through the Golden Compass trilogy and ended up wishing I could get that month of my life back.

I'm starting Eclipse today, and I just hope that it'll get better.  All these people who love the books (who aren't horny teenagers) can't all be wrong.  But I'm not sure I'll ever feel like nothing more than a dirty old woman reading about 17 (or, I guess 108 in vampire years) year old Edward's chiseled marble chest and his smoldering amber eyes and his velvety bedroom voice.  GAH! *shudder*